They’re not nearly as batshit as yesterday’s Washington NFL renderings — not to mention they’re for a building that is actually getting built in an actual location — but the Milwaukee Bucks have released renderings of their new $500 million arena being built with $505 million in public subsidies:
That outer shell that supposedly looks like a “wave” (if waves were brown, which I don’t really want to think too hard about) is going to be made up of “zinc panels chemically treated to achieve a gritty, brown-rust patina,” which is a different kind of intentional rust color than the weathered steel used on the Brooklyn Nets arena, but promises to be just as ugly. (Name one attractive rust-brown building you’ve seen. I’ll wait.)
The inner seating bowl is somewhat more promising, though the cheap seats in those tiny upper decks separated by two decks of luxury suites are going to royally suck; and while the large lower deck will be nice for anyone who can afford to sit there, forcing everyone to enter and exit at the back of the section is going to make for some epic foot traffic jams at the end of games.
As usual, though, the real fun part is nitpicking the little details that the architects probably added at 1 am when they didn’t know how to fill out a blank space on their drawings. Like, what’s up with that strange balcony projecting off the front of the building, the better for drunken fans to throw their beers/themselves down onto passersby? And how much did those people pay to stand in those weirdly backlit sections in the upper-deck corners, and why? Who are those two opposing players near midcourt supposed to be guarding? What exactly is Greg Monroe doing in that replay (?) on the video board? Why does anyone think Greg Monroe will still be on the Bucks when the new arena opens in 2018? Play along yourself in comments!